After all three social workers (mine, hers, and the family finder) met with me, the family finder sent me some lovely feedback about how they thought I was wonderful and they are all in strong agreement it’s a really excellent match, and they picked me!!! This means they are not looking at anyone else to be this little girl’s parents, and they are going to book in a linking/matching panel date for me sometime in June or July.
This Easter I went on a truly wonderful mini-break in the UK with a friend of mine who has an EXTREMELY sexy camper van.
I have recently started to realise the UK has just so many awesome things to see and do, and I really don’t make enough time to explore this tiny but awesome little island. My recent trips to Leicester and London (and previous trips to various Henges) have shown me just how much there is to do right in my own backyard and it’s encouraged me to try and plan a few more little mini-breaks here and there!
First stop, we drove down to Wookey Hole (I have ALWAYS wanted to go there, and my dad was actually born there during the war too).
So long in fact I have had to give it sub-headings – madness!
I’ve been reflecting recently on how I can reduce my carbon footprint, and how to navigate the ins and outs of caring for our environment in an increasingly plastic-filled world. The fact is, I travel an awful lot, both for work and for pleasure. Usually by air, and I worry about all that C02 I am contributing to global warming. I also purchase an awful lot of products that are wrapped in plastic.
A friend told me recently you can just pay £20 or so whenever you fly to offset your carbon – in other words, I can be lazy and pay someone to plant a tree on my behalf so I can jet around the world. I am unsure about carbon offset schemes and how effective they are, but I must admit to being very ignorant about it all, so I’ve been doing some research to try and figure it all out.(Please note that my “research” has been ad hoc and not at all systematic, and I discovered that a lot of it was from quite a few years ago, so my deepest apologies if any of my assertions appear to be out of date with current thinking!).
It’s been about 18 months since I started my adoption journey, and about 8 months since I was approved. Child 3 and Child 4’s social workers both said no to me in the end (I just found out today about both).
Child 3 they are moving ahead with another, better match, and Child 4’s Social Workers decided that they wanted 2 parents for him so won’t consider my profile (so in their case it is specifically because I am single).
Well, in a completely perfectly timed moment, two of my best friends came to stay and we went off on a little mini-adventure to explore Leicester (we do love a mini-break).
It was a perfectly-timed mini-holiday with fun and lots of good food and plenty of booze and lots of interesting things to see and do, and cheered me up immensely!
The MAIN reason for going was to see the Car Park where they dug up Richard III a couple of years ago, which was a ridiculous and amazing thing. (If you’re interested in the whole story, there is a documentary about it called The King in the Car Park, in which a slightly batty and obsessed lady spends years fundraising so she can dig up the car park, and lo and behold the king turned out to be in there!).
I’m getting bored of using the “emotional rollercoaster” metaphor, even if it is by far the most apt…
So, where were we? It’s been 7 months since I was approved, and after 2 failed potential matches, I went to an activity day, met some children, felt mildly traumatised, and then decided to express interest in a child with a slightly unusual name. Then I did some reflecting on prejudice, and then I just waited.
When I started writing this, I wasn’t intending to post it, just to write down my thoughts as a way of untangling them, but as I’ve gone along I decided it was worth sharing, so here we are.
I recently bumped up against my own prejudice, which is something we are rarely aware of or conscious of – no-one likes to think of themselves as being prejudiced do they? We all like to think that’s something that happens to other people, because we are far too woke and liberal and enlightened to have any prejudices. And yet we do. We all have them. Continue reading →