Light at the end of the tunnel

So since I last wrote we did another week in isolation, it was hard, and I was still utterly exhausted all the time and getting awful headaches most days.

I had another really tough day on the Friday (our last day of isolation) and woke up knackered and weepy and just couldn’t stop crying all morning. My lovely mum came down to stay for a few days, as it turns out 26 days in total isolation trapped in the house with a small child was enough to break me completely. After a few days of rest while my mum helped out with my daughter, the kid went back to nursery at last and I took a few extra days off work to really try and rest properly without a small child around. The doctor also prescribed me some antibiotics in case the headaches were related to sinusitis or a secondary infection, as my temperature was still going up and down a lot and something clearly still wasn’t right with my body.

I don’t know if it was the rest, the antibiotics, or just time, but I finally started to feel properly better, and I have now felt well (and normal) for two weeks, and my temperature has been completely back to normal ever since the antibiotics. Continue reading

Mama Bears & Bin Drinks

It’s been a while hasn’t it?

Let’s see, what have we been up to? Frankly not a lot, what with winter and lockdown and so on. 

I have FINALLY cracked the sleep thing and she’s got the hang of sleeping in her own bed all night, and staying there until the sun clock comes up (I really shouldn’t say such things out loud, it always jinxes it…). And I’ve installed some amazing toddler toilet seats and got some steps so I no longer have to deal with the potty most of the time, which is nice, having slightly less of someone else’s shit to dispose of…

Our mornings are in a pretty good routine now, and are punctuated by the calm, repetitive nature of CBeebies… Continue reading

Quarantine Diary: Week 10

Sunday 24th May

It’s my birthday! We had SUCH a lovely day! The kid was really excited and helped me open presents in the morning and I baked a fresh loaf of sourdough (one of my best so far).

I got loads of lovely presents and cards, and we picked some of the gorgeous roses from my garden to put in a vase.

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Quarantine Diary: Week 9

Sunday 17th May

Despite falling asleep knackered half an hour earlier than normal, the kid was up at 1.30am and took a while to go back to sleep, though when she woke up again at 6am she came into my bed and we both slept til around 8.30am which was nice. After breakfast we got in the car and went back to Port Meadow, this time to meet a couple of friends from London who haven’t left the city since lockdown began. Was SO lovely to see them and go for a socially-distanced walk (we stayed 2m apart the whole time). It felt so normal to finally be able to see friends again, and go for walks etc.

It was a lovely day, and we got to see all the horses and cows up close this time which the kid loved.

Back home for lunch, but I had a killer headache again so went to lie down for a bit. Couldn’t sleep so just lay there for a while and then came back down. I can’t tell if these headaches are from stress, tiredness, or my sinuses as my hayfever has been really bad this year. Or maybe because I often clench my jaw at night and grind my teeth – who knows, but it’s annoying.

Mum kindly took the kid out for a walk and left me to chill out for a bit, and I made some more bread (I am VERY pleased with this one – my breadwanker status is getting worse….).

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Quarantine Diary: Week 8

Sunday 10th May

Apart from being up briefly at 2am (she went back down very quickly) the kid actually slept through in her own bed until 7.15am. Which meant that for the first time in ages I woke up naturally to the birdsong outside, instead of being punched in the boobs. It’s amazing how quickly you can start to appreciate something as simple as waking up in a normal manner.

It was hot last night, so I slept with the windows open, which meant apart from the bright morning light at 5am, I also heard the 2am shouters further up my street, the 5am birds and the 6am ducks that my neighbours keep. And the 3am cats caterwauling, which sounds a lot like my kid screaming for me, so my body was up and halfway down the stairs before my brain realised it was coming from outside and I could just go back to bed. Continue reading

Quarantine Diary: Week 7

Sunday 3rd May

Slept ok last night though the kid woke up and screamed in my face and kicked me at 7am to wake me up which was unpleasant. She also had a nappy mishap last night so I had to strip down the bed at 10.30pm and change all the sheets but she barely woke up while I changed her. I’ve woken up with another headache this morning. Feels like I’ve had a low-level headache for days.

Mixed morning – the kid played happily with her cars for a bit, and read some books to herself. Then she screamed and melted down for a while. I made the mistake of digging out her Tiger Trunki suitcase thinking it would be a fun new thing to play with, as she can put things in it and ride it around. She packed with with toys, carried it to the front door and said “Put it in the car! Go Grandma’s house!” which of course I had to say we were not doing. Hence more meltdowns. Eventually we compromised and took the tiger suitcase for a walk down the street. It’s incredibly noisy and not really designed for outside, so I’m pretty sure it will have woken up and annoyed all my neighbours, but nevermind.

Overall the day was tough. The kid was knackered and kept melting down all day. I realised I was also knackered and struggling to play with her – I am glued to my phone or my laptop at all times, desperate to interact with the rest of the world, or to escape from the monotony and boredom, so I am constantly reading the news, checking social media, texting people, and am just too bored and tired to play incredibly dull toddler games over and over. The kid has shouted at me several times to put my phone down, which is telling. I wish I could, but haven’t got the energy or patience to sit and do nothing or play with her. I’m tired and bored and missing all the social interaction and I need to be occupied (by my phone). Ironically a couple of friends texted me today to see if I wanted a chat, but was too knackered to talk to anyone. Can’t work up the energy and don’t have anything at all to say, though I did have brief calls with my mum and my dad in the morning to say a quick hello

I made some more bread dough for tomorrow. I’m looking forward to my remote sourdough class on Thursday. I’ve fed my yeast starter and it’s bubbling away nicely in the fridge. Had some lovely feedback on my pottery catalogue and have sold a lot of pieces to friends already which is nice (I haven’t made it public yet as I wanted my friends to have a chance to buy things first if they wanted, and frankly I’d rather have stuff that I’ve made go to friends instead of strangers. It was hard enough to decide what to sell in the first place, as my instinct is to keep it all, so knowing it’s gone to people that I love really helps…).

My hayfever this year has been really crazy – far worse than normal, with constant running nose and sneezing. I suspect it’s the fact that no-one is cutting back all the verges and parks so the grass and wildflowers are rampant, which is lovely but annoying if you get hayfever! We are seeing so many butterflies that I’ve downloaded an app to start learning how to identify them, which is adding a bit of extra fun to our walks. Continue reading

Adventures in Bread-making

Here is a different kind of diary – one woman’s journey of learning to make bread.

Attempt 1: The wholemeal rolls. 

This was a recipe we were given by our nursery, and we used half wholemeal half white flour, but they still came out pretty brown overall. We added sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds and poppy seeds. The kid had lots of fun making this, especially all the kneading and squishing and squashing.

Not looking too good after the first proove.

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Quarantine Diary: Week 6

Sunday 26th April

Feeling tired and sluggish again this morning. Kid was up at 2.30am-3am and again around 5ish, and then got up at 6.30am, so it was quite a broken night. Had a nice video call with the family and then we walked up to the garage to get more milk. Started another batch of dough off to rise that we’ll cook tomorrow, though my waistline is not loving the new addiction to bread… Might take half a loaf over to the neighbours tomorrow so we’ve only got half a loaf to eat…

Swept the floors, had lunch and then went off for another mega-long walk as the weather is so lovely and it’s due to rain next week.

This time we went down another new path and discovered an amazing local nature reserve that I had no idea was there! It was beautiful, and I reckon the kid walked nearly 4km! She was walking for almost 2 hours straight which is astonishing. One really positive thing about this lockdown is that she is getting much better at walking further and further distances and we have pretty much given up using the buggy now that she’s not napping anyway. I am really enjoying discovering all these amazing spaces right on our doorstep. If there hadn’t been a lockdown I’m not sure I would have ever discovered them!

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Quarantine Diary: Week 5

Sunday 19th April

Forgot to mention that we finally started getting post again on Friday, after nearly two weeks without, though still no letter from Boris as yet.

Today we are trying bread attempt number 2: A packet of ready-mixed bread dough from the shop (tomato and cheese flavour) that you just add water to. They ended up spreading out but not rising upwards much, so we got some very wide, flat rolls, but these ones were much lighter and fluffier than the last attempt!

The weather is lovely and sunny again so we managed a little bike ride round the park this morning and another nice walk in the afternoon up to the golf course. It was definitely busier today – we saw a lot more people out for walks, not sure if it was the nice weather or the fact that it’s a Sunday or a bit of both. But everyone was very good about distancing and staying well away from each other. By the time we got home I realised I had walked 6km today (though she did some of that on her bike) – which is probably more than we’ve done for a week! We are both tired out, and hopefully will sleep well. Continue reading