Another update from the world of Maya…

Well well well, it has been a while, hasn’t it?

I guess what with not travelling so much anymore, and so on, that I just seem to have less to write about (other than my cats, but that seems to perpetuate the stereotype about sad single women in their 30’s and has inadvertently encouraged people to treat me as such, so I’ve decided to stop doing writing about my cats, no matter how hilarious they are).

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Early Warning Signs…

Wednesday 3rd October 2012

Looks like it’s time for another chatty newsletter from me! You lucky lucky people!

London 2012

I have to admit, I honestly wasn’t all that bothered about the Olympics at first. With the exception of Wimbledon, I don’t generally get excited about any form of organised sport, and I don’t have a whole lot of national pride to bandy about. I am for the most part wholly unpatriotic, and couldn’t give a monkey’s whether or not we, as an island, are better than other geographical locations at Football or Rugby or Cricket etc.

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S.A.D. and the incredible adventures of Spidercat

Saturday 11th August 2013

Hello again my lovelies!
It has been AGES since my last chatty update, so it MUST be time for another one!
This one has become quite epic (quel surprise!) as there’s almost 3 month’s worth of news to cram in, so I am going to divvy it up into some little subsections like a proper newsletter!

Saving the world…
Let’s see, work has been busy busy busy, so not much to report there, except that since finally launching our first e-learning course, I am now officially tech support for an awful lot of complete morons out there in the ether…
The most typical problems are “can’t log in” – mostly solved by checking that their caps lock isn’t on when typing in their password etc. I have also had two people email me to tell me that they don’t have internet access. Hard to know how to respond to that via email without insinuating that they must be at least slightly retarded, but nevertheless we were able to establish that by emailing me their problem, they have in fact actually accessed the internet…..
And so on.

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Jumping out of cakes and so on…

Thursday 10th May 2012

Hello again!

Must be time for another scintillating update from Maya!

Let me see, since I last wrote, I have been on a wee holiday to the US to surprise my friend E and attend another friend (Suzie’s) wedding, which was lovely! Saw some very beautiful Rocky Mountains in Colorado, and discovered that lasagna takes twice as long to cook at higher altitude! Then I drove a big truck on the wrong side of the road in Dallas, got a pedicure and attended a wonderful and unique wedding! I also briefly became the Bride-Whisperer and my main duties included keeping the bride sane (which mostly involved topping up her rum and coke) while distracting her tee-total mother with questions about punch, chicken salad and the correct way to drape organza!…

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Do you believe in Dinosaurs?

Thursday 16th February 2012

Well, well, well, it’s been MONTHS since my last update!
You poor people! You must have been positively gasping for a nice long, chatty update on Maya’s life….
No?
Well, tough, cos that’s what you’re getting.

So, what’s new in the world of Maya?

Well, I’ve now been happily installed in my lovely house for over 6 months, and it’s starting to feel all comfortable and homey. I have made the obligatory sacrifice to the carpet gods and spilled the ceremonial red wine, so it is now offcially mine!
I have painted and decorated on a couple of walls, just because I can, and thanks to some expert advice from my mother have been able to populate my garden with some hibernating plants that will hopefully pop up and be lovely in spring and summer…. Continue reading

Home Owner, part deux

Friday 5th August 2011

Just though I should add a few extra things to amuse you, as my new house is so awesome, there’s just so much to tell!

After the incident with the kitchen door, in which I met my neighbours for the first time while hanging halfway out of the kitchen window, and the seriously mature way that I dealt with spiders, I have now progressed to an even giddier height of maturity – gardening and DIY.

By gardening, I mean that I have transferred some pot plants into some other, slightly bigger, pots. I think that practically counts as landscape gardening. Makes me feel incredibly grown-up.

Also, on Monday night, after a full day at work AND an aerobics class, I successfully operated my drill for the first time, and installed two roller-blinds PERFECTLY in my spare room. I was so proud of myself, as I figured it out all on my own and didn’t need any help at all. No-one ever told me before what a enormous sense of accomplishment and achievement you can get from successful DIY. My mum has always been so good at DIY, and I always felt a bit sad that I didn’t get that gene, but lo and behold I appear to have it! It’s like discovering a dormant superpower! Suddenly I am invincible! I even went out and bought a spirit level!

I was so incredibly chuffed with myself about those blinds that I felt like a rockstar. I felt like Superwoman. I was basically the Bono of DIY. I took myself off to bed, grinning like a maniac, and was just thinking that this must be how God felt at the end of the 6th day, after creating roller-blinds and realising she just couldn’t top that…..

…..but then my Ikea flat-pack bed collapsed underneath me. Continue reading